At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
