Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
