I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
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i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
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And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He called his dick the "gentle giant"