the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
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The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
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About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived