Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
They are going to name an STD after you.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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