i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize