We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
