Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize