Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
