That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize
