i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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