He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
