I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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