i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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