Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize