god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Life without a bra equals bliss.
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
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