he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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