shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Randomize