white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
There are leaves in my underwear?
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