East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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