Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
