thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Randomize
