my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
