seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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