I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
