They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
His nipple licking is glorious
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