I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
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Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
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