You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
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I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
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I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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