i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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