dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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