Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
