I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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