dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
