Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
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