people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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