You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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