Small penises have feelings too.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
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As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
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Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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