I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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