She's JV to your varsity
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
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