Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
