so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Success! We fucked roommates!
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