Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
