I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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