I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
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