What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
