Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
Randomize
