i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
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Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
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I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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