Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
