He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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