I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize