is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
he's gonorrhea incarnate
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
