Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
I enjoy the company of your penis
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
